Category: Prose
-
Understanding My Body and why it is the way it is.
My body was designed by the genetics of survival, to outlast famine and scarcity.It was designed not to conquer by force, as it would be if I had massive musculature that does not require training, but to be there when the fighting is over, thin from starvation, but very much alive.This mix of every oppressed…
-
Leveling Up
In Star Trek Online (the last time I played),When you reach level 65 you have access to all the good ships, all the good armor, all the good missions, and all the good abilities.You strive for that because (in your mind) you believe that reaching that level you suddenly get rewarded.In reality, by the time…
-
A Question to Ponder
You hear a lot about being “authentic”. What does that mean? I looked it up… It means “living in true alignment with your own set of values and not confirming to others expectations” … right. Who among us is then, authentic? How do you develop these sets of internal values if not cherry picking from…
-
As a Horse
“Like a horse facing the wind”… A long time ago, a friend of mine told me that a horse will face into the wind when a storm was approaching. I suspected that this wasn’t true, but not being a horse person, I took it to mean that it’s better to face into a problem than…
-
New Year’s Eve
Of all the “holidays” that we, as a society, celebrate, New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day are the most “modern”. Devoid of any pretense of meaning that underlies our celebrations of Christmas, Hanukah, Saturnalia, Yule, Samhain, or Kwanzaa; “New Years” is unabashedly artificial, A placeholder for revelry and sadness based on the turning of…
-
So there’s this bush…
There’s this bush by my house. It just sits there minding its own business, but every June , it reminds me that it’s a lilac bush. This unassuming green bush blossoms in an amazing display of purple flowers. And the perfume… worth the cost of the allergy meds. Now, it doesn’t care who watches it,…
-
You Remind me of My Father
I went to the coffee shop the other day, before work. I carried my usual array of bags, backpack, lunch box, water bottles, you know… stuff. So when I went to pay for the coffee, I stuck my free hand in my pants pocket and pulled out a handful of change and a crumpled dollar…
-
And in the darkness…
Sunlight is the best disinfectant, both figuratively as well as literally. This is certainly the case when human failings are covered up. Plots, schemes, and conspiracies have been brought down when scrutiny and “the light of public scrutiny” is brought to bear. But… The light is not usually where to go to find evil things.…
-
It’s Exhausting To Feel: Reflection On Emerging From The Covid Experience (written June 27, 2021)
18 months ago I was happy… and sad. I smiled, and frowned, and made jokes that came from inside, went on rants , and spoke of kindness. Then it happened and the world turned into death. Not the individual deaths (like the kind I’m just now processing) but death on a massive scale. It was…
-
Sweet Dreams And Time Machines
Which world is real? Sleep is a necessary thing… or so “they” say, and “they” should know, they’ve done the research. We know how it feels, a bad night versus good, refreshed vs beat… but why? Do we even know when we fall asleep? The moment, I mean. Are we conscious? Or (hear me out),…
-
I just don’t know how that works
I may have control issues. I always need to know how things work, and the “why?”, and the “who figured that out?” It sometimes drains the wonder out of things. I don’t need to know the details necessarily, but a knowledge of the principles keeps me comfortable. Take flying for instance, I have trust issues…
-
On the need to look down…
An Observation From Medical Training A transformative experience is one in which your perception of reality is changed forever. One of mine was during my training (Pulmonary medicine and Critical care) for critical care. It was a long holiday weekend and I had been on call in the hospital for 5 full days… these were…
-
Invisibility and Hats
I have taken to wearing hats. In the summer I wear a dignified Panama hat, when it rains, I choose a wide brimmed waterproof Fedora, and in the winter I’ll be wearing a somewhat toned-down version of the classic Indiana Jones hat. I like the wide brims of these hats and the way they keep…
It’s Loud Inside My Head… The Poetry and Prose of A Man Who Feels Too Much. 